Menopause DOES NOT Make You Fat

It's official. I'm in the throes of menopause. My gynecologist just called, breathless with excitement, to tell me that the blood work shows that my hormone levels have now reached actual menopause levels. None of that perimenopause shit for me, kids! Right to the big time!

Of course, this is no kind of revelation to me. In fact, I had to practically pin my gynecologist against the wall and force her to do the blood work that was all I needed to confirm my suspicions. After all, I have been having hot flashes for at least a year. And a period only once every two or three months. I guess I really didn't need a doctor to tell me what is happening to me. But since mom had a hysterectomy, I had no idea when I should actually expect it. And the doctor kept telling me that I was too young.

Whatever, doc.

I cannot take any type of hormone replacement. Mom died, horribly, from breast cancer. There was no family history that we knew of when she was diagnosed. Mom was an only child, with few relatives here in the U.S. But she didn't really have any of the other red flags that would make you think that this was someone who would get breast cancer. She didn't drink. She didn't smoke. She never had fibrous breasts. But she did take hormone replacement therapy for years after her hysterectomy. Thus, no HRT for me.

Actually, I don't mind. Everyone told me that, without it, I'd get fat. That I'd get osteoporosis. That I'd have wild mood swings. Well, here is how I see it.

I'm most definitely not fat. In fact, I might be in the best physical shape I've been since I was 25. I'm down to about 115 (at 5'5") and eating healthfully because I don't have to please some idiot man with tons of red meat, potatoes, and gravy. I also walk at least 12 miles a week. So, fat ain't happenin', kids. If I do say so myself, I look great.

As far as osteoporosis goes...well, that is a worry. My grandmother had it. My mother had it until her poor bones were overrun with cancer. And my oldest sister has it due to her Crohn's disease. But I consume lots of dairy products, especially cheese, yogurt, and ice cream. I exercise. And that's all I can do. Hopefully, it's enough.

And wild mood swings? Well, they might have been caused by menopause, but they were more likely caused by the shit X has put me through this past year. And they seem to be gone now that he is completely out of my life.

So, you ask, why am I so cheerful about being in menopause? First, the easy answer: I will never again have to worry about failed birth control. In fact, I never have to worry about birth control, period. Woo hoo! There's something so liberating about reaching this stage of life. And that's above and beyond the lack of menses and being sterile. I'm sorta at a point where I just don't care what people think anymore. It's much more important what I think.

And so, I'm taking this feeling of freedom and carelessness and running with it. I'm going to do what I want, when I want, where I want, and with who I want.

Of course, right now? That would be Ken. I'm taking him, damn it! I don't care how young he is. He wants me. He's currently worshiping me. And I'm enjoying it. I'm think I'm really, really liking this menopause thing.